Yesterday morning when I woke up, I had hope for the future. However, after watching the news last night, all I can say is that all that hope has been flushed down the crapper! Shame on you America for believing the words of a man who is ashamed of our country, and has done nothing for the last 4 years but take it on a path to communism! If you were actually stupid enough to vote for Obama, I hope you still feel that way after you end up jobless, homeless, and have to watch your children's future go down the drain.
Way to go, America! You just signed our country's death sentence!
Wednesday, November 7, 2012
Thursday, June 21, 2012
Make an Idiot of Myself? Who...Me?
Today I learned a very important lesson. The lesson was: I too, can make an idiot of myself and when I do, it is done like no other. Here's what happened. Due to my being a crazy, weird, goofy person, I enjoy grossing out my sister with random things in everyday conversation. Normally, the word "colon" is enough to gross the poor girl out but today, I felt that the grossness factor needed to be taken up a notch to "hemorrhoids." I had talked to my sister on the phone this morning so I decided to text her instead. I pulled up the message, hit "reply," and typed: "When you have hemorrhoids does it feel like you have a round ball stuck in your butt?" I know... you don't even have to say it. I'm sick and twisted. I've already been told that before. So the reply was: "No, mine just normally itch or burn." That was when I decided to bring it home and try to make her laugh so, I typed: "Oh. I guess it's just a whopper or something stuck up there." I was busting up laughing while my dog looked at me with utter disgust. The phone dinged and I opened the message. "I think you better get that checked out!" After reading it and laughing, my eyes strayed up to where it shows who was replying to my text. I stared at the phone trying to feel horrified (I often have a hard time feeling bad or embarrassed about the things I do) but only was able to laugh. I had been talking to one of my best friends whose name started with the same letter as my sister. So.. for all those of you out there who like to pull pranks or jokes through texts, all I have to say is: Always double check and make sure you sending the text to the right person!
Wednesday, June 20, 2012
Sad, Sad Signs
All I have to say is.... people really need to think about what they put on a sign and then check them frequently!
Need I say more?
Thursday, June 14, 2012
What Am I, Flypaper For Morons?
I wasn't going to post today because... let's face it. I don't really have anything helpful or interesting happening in my life today (or ever) and I'm kind of a boring person. But then, when you least expect it, something just drops out of the sky like a big pile of bird crap and you just have to go with it.
Without further adieu... today's blog post is about people you don't know coming to your house and expecting you to open the door to them. I mean, really? Have they not heard of stranger danger or that it's rude to show up without being invited, or even being an acquaintance of that person? Here's what happened:
I was calmly putting my brunch (ok, my pile of fat and cholesterol) on my plate when I hear someone knocking on the door. I start to head in there, when I realize that 1) this extremely rude person just showed up without an invitation, 2) my steaming tower of pancakes is getting cold while I stand there and think about this, and 3) my dog is not running crazily into the living room to happily greet whomever is standing on my porch. I know that a normal person would have already been answering the door by that time, but, let's face it... I'm the type of person who would take a vacation in an insane asylum just to watch and make fun of all the weirdos in there especially if it was a FREE vacation! So, when my dog didn't come tearing into the house to meet our lovely guest or possible psychopath, I became a little concerned.
Very stealthily, I dropped to my hands and knees, which is AMAZING for a girl my size. Then, I army crawled over to the door and attempted to jump to my feet as quietly as possible. Picture it... fat girl trying to jump up off the floor. Let's just say that eventually, I gave up and just stood up and let me tell ya, that was no easy feat when you are trying to be quiet! So, I finally, make it up and I peek out the window to see if I recognize the car. After realizing that it was an unknown vehicle as well, I plastered myself agains the front door and decided to wait them out, the whole time thinking of my pancakes getting colder by the minute.
After what seemed like an eternity and having listened to the stranger knock on the door 3 separate times (who waits that long?), they finally stomped off to their car. That's when I realized my future calling as an undercover agent or in other words a SPY! Without being seen, I peeked out the window and watched as the very large, very football player lookingish woman stalked back to her vehicle. By this point, I was tempted to throw open the door, grab the nearest object, and run at her like a scary person to see if they would run for their lives ( I know it sounds crazy, but, it's summer and this is the most exciting thing that has happened to this poor little schoolteacher so far). Realizing that this would make me actually have to talk to the person if they didn't run and that it might cause them to call the police in order to accuse me of attempted assault, and that my pancakes were probably stone cold by now, I decided to stay in my snooping porch and see what they would do.
I wish I could say they did something so exciting and crazy I wouldn't even be able to write about it but, all she did was sit in her car for five minutes. Didn't even text. Isn't there some kind of unspoken rule that if someone doesn't answer their door, you are required to leave immediately and not sit outside their house in your car like a psycho crazy stalker person? I don't know, maybe those are just the rules I make up for the invisible world in my head. Anyway, she finally left. I returned to my pancakes with my mouth watering only to find that they had indeed gone stone cold and all thanks to some stupid person who came to my house uninvited which leads us to today's helpful hint:
Post a sign on your door that says please ring doorbell. Then conveniently attach a tack with the pointy end sticking out so that when they ring the doorbell, they will know they are an unwanted guest and won't return. Just make sure that you tell your friends and family NOT to ring the doorbell. Of course, if you can't stand stupid people and strangers coming to your house, the other option would be to post a sign that says:
Without further adieu... today's blog post is about people you don't know coming to your house and expecting you to open the door to them. I mean, really? Have they not heard of stranger danger or that it's rude to show up without being invited, or even being an acquaintance of that person? Here's what happened:
I was calmly putting my brunch (ok, my pile of fat and cholesterol) on my plate when I hear someone knocking on the door. I start to head in there, when I realize that 1) this extremely rude person just showed up without an invitation, 2) my steaming tower of pancakes is getting cold while I stand there and think about this, and 3) my dog is not running crazily into the living room to happily greet whomever is standing on my porch. I know that a normal person would have already been answering the door by that time, but, let's face it... I'm the type of person who would take a vacation in an insane asylum just to watch and make fun of all the weirdos in there especially if it was a FREE vacation! So, when my dog didn't come tearing into the house to meet our lovely guest or possible psychopath, I became a little concerned.
Very stealthily, I dropped to my hands and knees, which is AMAZING for a girl my size. Then, I army crawled over to the door and attempted to jump to my feet as quietly as possible. Picture it... fat girl trying to jump up off the floor. Let's just say that eventually, I gave up and just stood up and let me tell ya, that was no easy feat when you are trying to be quiet! So, I finally, make it up and I peek out the window to see if I recognize the car. After realizing that it was an unknown vehicle as well, I plastered myself agains the front door and decided to wait them out, the whole time thinking of my pancakes getting colder by the minute.
After what seemed like an eternity and having listened to the stranger knock on the door 3 separate times (who waits that long?), they finally stomped off to their car. That's when I realized my future calling as an undercover agent or in other words a SPY! Without being seen, I peeked out the window and watched as the very large, very football player lookingish woman stalked back to her vehicle. By this point, I was tempted to throw open the door, grab the nearest object, and run at her like a scary person to see if they would run for their lives ( I know it sounds crazy, but, it's summer and this is the most exciting thing that has happened to this poor little schoolteacher so far). Realizing that this would make me actually have to talk to the person if they didn't run and that it might cause them to call the police in order to accuse me of attempted assault, and that my pancakes were probably stone cold by now, I decided to stay in my snooping porch and see what they would do.
I wish I could say they did something so exciting and crazy I wouldn't even be able to write about it but, all she did was sit in her car for five minutes. Didn't even text. Isn't there some kind of unspoken rule that if someone doesn't answer their door, you are required to leave immediately and not sit outside their house in your car like a psycho crazy stalker person? I don't know, maybe those are just the rules I make up for the invisible world in my head. Anyway, she finally left. I returned to my pancakes with my mouth watering only to find that they had indeed gone stone cold and all thanks to some stupid person who came to my house uninvited which leads us to today's helpful hint:
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Fiberlicious!
Who knew fiber could be so yummy? In the past whenever I heard the word "fiber," I would turn and run out of fear. I mean it just sounds creepy. Plus, I'm sure listening to old people talk about how when you get old, your colon and intestines seem to take on a mind of their own didn't help. I just figured that when you got old, you had to buy stock in metamucil and the other fiber filled old people drinks. However, after hitting my mid-30's, I've found that fiber can be your best friend even when you're young, especially if it comes wrapped up in a yummy looking package.
I had my first encounter with a fiber filled object a few years back when fiber one started coming out with some of their products. I loved the granola bars but I sure didn't love the price. Needless to say, my love affair ended very quickly. Then just a couple of months ago, a friend introduced me once again to fiber. It was love at first sight- or love at first taste. She had made some cookies that were amazing and super inexpensive to make! The bonus that set my new found love of fiber in place was that they are super easy to make and I always have the ingredients in the house.
All you need is a chocolate or a spice cake mix, a 15 oz. can of pumpkin, and a bag of chocolate chips. Preheat the oven to 400 degrees. Empty the cake mix into a sifter and sift the mix into a bowl. Add the pumpkin and mix until you can no longer see the cake mix. It should be smooth. Add the bag of chocolate chips and mix together. I'm sure if you don't want to add chocolate chips you can add dried fruit or nuts. I just happen to be a chocaholic. Then all you have to do is put teaspoonfuls of the mixture onto a cookie sheet and bake for 12 minutes. When they come out, remove them immediately to a cookie rack and enjoy! They taste great with milk!
P.S. They freeze great too- even after they have been cooked!
I had my first encounter with a fiber filled object a few years back when fiber one started coming out with some of their products. I loved the granola bars but I sure didn't love the price. Needless to say, my love affair ended very quickly. Then just a couple of months ago, a friend introduced me once again to fiber. It was love at first sight- or love at first taste. She had made some cookies that were amazing and super inexpensive to make! The bonus that set my new found love of fiber in place was that they are super easy to make and I always have the ingredients in the house.
All you need is a chocolate or a spice cake mix, a 15 oz. can of pumpkin, and a bag of chocolate chips. Preheat the oven to 400 degrees. Empty the cake mix into a sifter and sift the mix into a bowl. Add the pumpkin and mix until you can no longer see the cake mix. It should be smooth. Add the bag of chocolate chips and mix together. I'm sure if you don't want to add chocolate chips you can add dried fruit or nuts. I just happen to be a chocaholic. Then all you have to do is put teaspoonfuls of the mixture onto a cookie sheet and bake for 12 minutes. When they come out, remove them immediately to a cookie rack and enjoy! They taste great with milk!P.S. They freeze great too- even after they have been cooked!
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Superhero Exercise
What's that? It's a plane, no, it's.... oh yeah, just me. Sorry, my delusions of being a superhero took over for a brief moment. Yes, as you read in my blog description, I truly believe everyone is a superhero-in-training or possibly a villain-in-training if you are just a total poobag. I admit, I have those days where being a villain is very enticing especially when all those stupid people around us are being extra annoying. I mean wouldn't be great to have superhero strength to the point where all you had to do is slightly flick someone upside their head and they would go shooting through the air to Timbuktu! It would be awesome!
Unfortunately, I don't have super human strength, yet. I barely have normal human strength. You see, the problem is that I enjoy food, TV, sleeping, and really, I mean, really hate exercise with a passion of ten thousand burning flames. I guess I could say that exercise is one of my many kryptonites. In order to show myself that nothing can take me out, (I know my head is a tad big, right now. I believe it is due to all the fat I'm carrying around as a fat girl) and due to the fact that next year I will be teaching first grade and will need to be able to get on the floor and back up again as quickly as possible, I decided that I needed to get my almost superhero body back. When I say back, I mean that once upon a time, long, long ago in a country far, far away.... I was actually...dare I say the word...SKINNY! (gasps all around!) Yes, I was skinny and was very close to my superhero body. Unfortunately, when I came home I became very lazy again and food became my sidekick.
So, in order to jazz myself up about confronting my kryptonite, I found a picture of a superhero and glued my face onto so I can look at it everyday and convince myself that I will survive! (cue the "I will survive" song). I also started a new exercise regimen. Needless to say, yesterday was pathetic. I only made it through 5 minutes of the exercise video. Today, I pulled myself up out of bed and with the help of my super puppy, Millie, (who stayed by my side throughout the entire video and gave me encouragement every time I would groan, gasp, and curl up into the fetal position on the floor) I made it through the whole entire video! (Applause fills the air and everyone begins to chant my name!) Of course, after having done the video, which by the way, is the best video I have ever found, every muscle in my body felt like cooked spaghetti. When I told my sister about my experience, she told me to post a spinach pasta recipe. In honor of my spaghetti noodle muscles, I have decided to take her advice and post a recipe for a pasta dish that I found in one of my cookbooks and tweaked it to my liking. In the future, I will post the coolest idea for making your very own superhero shoes while surfing the net! Until then, have fun and may the force be with you! (yes, I know they aren't superheroes, but everyone can use a little help!)
Spinach-stuffed Shells
15 uncooked jumbo pasta shells
*1 jar marinara sauce
1 cup cottage cheese (8 oz)
1/2 cup shredded mozzarella cheese
1 egg white
1/2 teaspoon dried basil
1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
dash of pepper
1 package (10 oz) frozen chopped spinach, thawed and squeezed dry
1 tablespoon shredded parmesan cheese
1. Cook the pasta according to package directions. While pasta is cooking, heat up the marinara sauce in a pot.
2. In a small bowl, combine the cottage cheese, mozzarella, egg white, basil, garlic powder, pepper and half of the spinach. Pour half of the sauce into a greased 11 in. x 7 in. pan.
3. Drain pasta and rinse in cold water. Stuff each shell with 2 tablespoons of the spinach mix. Arrange the stuffed shells over the sauce in the pan. Pour the remaining sauce over the shells.
4. Cover and bake at 375 degrees for 25 minutes or until it is completely heated. Sprinkle it with parmesan cheese. It should give 5 servings of pasta.
*If you don't like marinara sauce, you may substitute it with 1 envelope of a white sauce mix. Follow the instructions on the mix to make the sauce.
Unfortunately, I don't have super human strength, yet. I barely have normal human strength. You see, the problem is that I enjoy food, TV, sleeping, and really, I mean, really hate exercise with a passion of ten thousand burning flames. I guess I could say that exercise is one of my many kryptonites. In order to show myself that nothing can take me out, (I know my head is a tad big, right now. I believe it is due to all the fat I'm carrying around as a fat girl) and due to the fact that next year I will be teaching first grade and will need to be able to get on the floor and back up again as quickly as possible, I decided that I needed to get my almost superhero body back. When I say back, I mean that once upon a time, long, long ago in a country far, far away.... I was actually...dare I say the word...SKINNY! (gasps all around!) Yes, I was skinny and was very close to my superhero body. Unfortunately, when I came home I became very lazy again and food became my sidekick.
So, in order to jazz myself up about confronting my kryptonite, I found a picture of a superhero and glued my face onto so I can look at it everyday and convince myself that I will survive! (cue the "I will survive" song). I also started a new exercise regimen. Needless to say, yesterday was pathetic. I only made it through 5 minutes of the exercise video. Today, I pulled myself up out of bed and with the help of my super puppy, Millie, (who stayed by my side throughout the entire video and gave me encouragement every time I would groan, gasp, and curl up into the fetal position on the floor) I made it through the whole entire video! (Applause fills the air and everyone begins to chant my name!) Of course, after having done the video, which by the way, is the best video I have ever found, every muscle in my body felt like cooked spaghetti. When I told my sister about my experience, she told me to post a spinach pasta recipe. In honor of my spaghetti noodle muscles, I have decided to take her advice and post a recipe for a pasta dish that I found in one of my cookbooks and tweaked it to my liking. In the future, I will post the coolest idea for making your very own superhero shoes while surfing the net! Until then, have fun and may the force be with you! (yes, I know they aren't superheroes, but everyone can use a little help!)
Spinach-stuffed Shells
15 uncooked jumbo pasta shells
*1 jar marinara sauce
1 cup cottage cheese (8 oz)
1/2 cup shredded mozzarella cheese
1 egg white
1/2 teaspoon dried basil
1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
dash of pepper
1 package (10 oz) frozen chopped spinach, thawed and squeezed dry
1 tablespoon shredded parmesan cheese
1. Cook the pasta according to package directions. While pasta is cooking, heat up the marinara sauce in a pot.
2. In a small bowl, combine the cottage cheese, mozzarella, egg white, basil, garlic powder, pepper and half of the spinach. Pour half of the sauce into a greased 11 in. x 7 in. pan.
3. Drain pasta and rinse in cold water. Stuff each shell with 2 tablespoons of the spinach mix. Arrange the stuffed shells over the sauce in the pan. Pour the remaining sauce over the shells.
4. Cover and bake at 375 degrees for 25 minutes or until it is completely heated. Sprinkle it with parmesan cheese. It should give 5 servings of pasta.
*If you don't like marinara sauce, you may substitute it with 1 envelope of a white sauce mix. Follow the instructions on the mix to make the sauce.
Wednesday, June 6, 2012
Easy Oatmeal On-the-Go
Early mornings are of the devil! Seriously, there's nothing worse than waking up with early morning goobers impairing your vision while your eyes try to focus to see what time is on the clock. Then noticing that its not even daylight yet! Holy hannah! Who in their right mind would get up at that hour? Teachers! That's who. Yes, I'm a school teacher. For all those people out there who enjoy their sleep as much as me... let me just say that teaching is not the right job unless you love teaching as much as I do.
Because of this, I'm not much of a breakfast eater. I would rather sleep in and then starve until lunch then sacrifice a few hours of sleep to stuff my face with food. The only problem is that it's horrible for the metabolism and I'm sure is the cause of my weight gain. It surely can't be all the extra sleep I love to get! Well, this summer I've obviously been sleeping in everyday which forces my husband to get up and make his own breakfast. I know, I won't be winning the "wife of the year" award anytime soon.
While laying in bed one morning, I decided that I needed to change my evil ways. I actually made a plan. I decided that I would start a new exercise regimen that would include a eating breakfast in the morning. However, as soon as I thought this, the devil on my shoulder start whispering in my ear that I would have to get up early and make breakfast for myself and my husband and would it really be that beneficial in the end? Luckily, that morning, miracle happened and a little angel was on my other shoulder. When I picture it, I think of a super muscular Helga look a like angel who reached around my neck and flicked the devil with her little pinky which caused him to skyrocket off my shoulder due to her immense strength. Anyway, being the voice of reason and intelligence, she was able to convince me that I would survive missing a few more minutes and that I could actually do this.
I would like to say that I immediately jumped out bed with new found energy and a new zest for life but, I would be lying. I actually rolled over and went back to sleep in order to celebrate my new plan. Sad, I know. When I woke up a couple of hours later, I went straight to the computer to hunt down breakfast recipes that would be fast and easy for my husband and myself.
I discovered an awesome recipe for cold oatmeal that is kept in the fridge. At first- I was kind of grossed out. I mean who wants to eat oatmeal cold? However, after making it and tweaking the recipe slightly I found that it is awesome! It gives me the energy I need, tastes great, and since I'm not a big eater first thing in the morning, it is just the right amount. Plus, since it is stored in the fridge you always get the perfect portion size. The oatmeal needs to be uncooked so that when it sits overnight in the fridge it won't get gooey and gross but will soften up with the milk and yogurt. You can pretty much add anything you want into the oatmeal mixture including nuts, dried fruits, flax or chia seeds, or any type of canned or frozen fruit as well.
For all of the recipes, pour all the correct amounts of the ingredients into a mixing bowl. Mix them all together and pour into glass canning jars or some other type of container. I prefer the half pint jars as they are the perfect serving size (1 cup) for my family. Make sure that you label each jar so you know what is inside. Leave it overnight in the fridge and it will be ready the next morning! If you forget it or aren't in the mood the next morning... don't worry it will last up to 4 or 5 days in the fridge! If you like a thicker oatmeal you can put 3/4 to 1 cup of oats.
Below, I've included 5 different recipes you can make: Maple Oatmeal, Apple Cinnamon, Chocolate chocolate chip, and fruit. I have a pina colada, brown sugar & cinnamon and a pumpkin pie oatmeal recipe coming soon! Each recipe below makes 3 to 4 half pint canning jars (servings) or almost 4 cups of oatmeal. Let me know what you think!
Maple Oatmeal
1/2 cup uncooked oatmeal
2/3 cup milk
1/2 cup honey vanilla greek yogurt
4 teaspoons maple syrup
Apple Pie Oatmeal
1/2 cup uncooked oatmeal
2/3 cup milk
1/2 cup honey vanilla greek yogurt
1 teaspoon cinnamon
2 teaspoons honey or brown sugar
1/2 cup apples from apple pie filling.
Chocolate Chocolate Chip Oatmeal
1/2 cup uncooked oatmeal
2/3 cup milk
1/2 cup vanilla greek yogurt
2 tablespoons cocoa powder
2 teaspoons honey or sugar
1/2 cup chocolate chips
* if you don't want it to be extra chocolatey then leave out the cocoa powder. You can also add 1-2 tablespoons of peanut butter to make a "reeses" chocolate oatmeal.
Fruit Oatmeal
1/2 cup uncooked oatmeal
2/3 cup milk
1/2 honey vanilla yogurt
1/2 teaspoon vanilla
2 tablespoons fruit jam or preserves
1/2 to 2/3 cup fruit cut into chunks
Because of this, I'm not much of a breakfast eater. I would rather sleep in and then starve until lunch then sacrifice a few hours of sleep to stuff my face with food. The only problem is that it's horrible for the metabolism and I'm sure is the cause of my weight gain. It surely can't be all the extra sleep I love to get! Well, this summer I've obviously been sleeping in everyday which forces my husband to get up and make his own breakfast. I know, I won't be winning the "wife of the year" award anytime soon.
While laying in bed one morning, I decided that I needed to change my evil ways. I actually made a plan. I decided that I would start a new exercise regimen that would include a eating breakfast in the morning. However, as soon as I thought this, the devil on my shoulder start whispering in my ear that I would have to get up early and make breakfast for myself and my husband and would it really be that beneficial in the end? Luckily, that morning, miracle happened and a little angel was on my other shoulder. When I picture it, I think of a super muscular Helga look a like angel who reached around my neck and flicked the devil with her little pinky which caused him to skyrocket off my shoulder due to her immense strength. Anyway, being the voice of reason and intelligence, she was able to convince me that I would survive missing a few more minutes and that I could actually do this.
I would like to say that I immediately jumped out bed with new found energy and a new zest for life but, I would be lying. I actually rolled over and went back to sleep in order to celebrate my new plan. Sad, I know. When I woke up a couple of hours later, I went straight to the computer to hunt down breakfast recipes that would be fast and easy for my husband and myself.
I discovered an awesome recipe for cold oatmeal that is kept in the fridge. At first- I was kind of grossed out. I mean who wants to eat oatmeal cold? However, after making it and tweaking the recipe slightly I found that it is awesome! It gives me the energy I need, tastes great, and since I'm not a big eater first thing in the morning, it is just the right amount. Plus, since it is stored in the fridge you always get the perfect portion size. The oatmeal needs to be uncooked so that when it sits overnight in the fridge it won't get gooey and gross but will soften up with the milk and yogurt. You can pretty much add anything you want into the oatmeal mixture including nuts, dried fruits, flax or chia seeds, or any type of canned or frozen fruit as well.
For all of the recipes, pour all the correct amounts of the ingredients into a mixing bowl. Mix them all together and pour into glass canning jars or some other type of container. I prefer the half pint jars as they are the perfect serving size (1 cup) for my family. Make sure that you label each jar so you know what is inside. Leave it overnight in the fridge and it will be ready the next morning! If you forget it or aren't in the mood the next morning... don't worry it will last up to 4 or 5 days in the fridge! If you like a thicker oatmeal you can put 3/4 to 1 cup of oats.
Below, I've included 5 different recipes you can make: Maple Oatmeal, Apple Cinnamon, Chocolate chocolate chip, and fruit. I have a pina colada, brown sugar & cinnamon and a pumpkin pie oatmeal recipe coming soon! Each recipe below makes 3 to 4 half pint canning jars (servings) or almost 4 cups of oatmeal. Let me know what you think!
Maple Oatmeal
1/2 cup uncooked oatmeal
2/3 cup milk
1/2 cup honey vanilla greek yogurt
4 teaspoons maple syrup
Apple Pie Oatmeal
1/2 cup uncooked oatmeal
2/3 cup milk
1/2 cup honey vanilla greek yogurt
1 teaspoon cinnamon
2 teaspoons honey or brown sugar
1/2 cup apples from apple pie filling.
Chocolate Chocolate Chip Oatmeal
1/2 cup uncooked oatmeal
2/3 cup milk
1/2 cup vanilla greek yogurt
2 tablespoons cocoa powder
2 teaspoons honey or sugar
1/2 cup chocolate chips
* if you don't want it to be extra chocolatey then leave out the cocoa powder. You can also add 1-2 tablespoons of peanut butter to make a "reeses" chocolate oatmeal.
Fruit Oatmeal
1/2 cup uncooked oatmeal
2/3 cup milk
1/2 honey vanilla yogurt
1/2 teaspoon vanilla
2 tablespoons fruit jam or preserves
1/2 to 2/3 cup fruit cut into chunks
Sunday, June 3, 2012
Pet Poop clean-up
I know the blog has the word "poop" in the title but, I never thought I would actually write about poop. Here it goes. I have many pet peeves- morons who drive, morons at the grocery store, if you talk to my husband he would tell you that just about everything irritates me and I can spot a moron a mile away. However, my biggest pet peeve is when someone lets their pet, poop in someone else's yard and doesn't clean it up.
On that note, I was walking out to the trashcan, when I began to smell a very distinct odor. Then I spotted it..... the brown nose offender. This wasn't the first time someone had left a smelly gift on our property. Recently, very recently, we found a huge pile of poop (like the circumference of a bowling ball) on the side of our house by our backyard fence. For those interested, I'm not a poop inspector but I'm pretty sure it came from either a cow or a horse. Now, I knew this morning, that my dog wasn't the mysterious pooping bandit, as she isn't allowed in the front yard. So, immediately I felt my blood pressure rise. I mean, I can understand if you want to let your dog crap all over your yard and property... afterall, it belongs to you. What peeves me off is that it really isn't difficult to clean up your pet's poop as you take it for a walk. Even better.. train it to poop before you leave the house especially if you're to stupid to know how to pick up the poop or just to lazy and inconsiderate to do so!
Luckily, for those of us who do enjoy taking our pets on walks, there are plenty of products out there for cleaning up after our pets. Petco has a variety of great products all the way from scoopers to bags and even a bag with a scoop attached. If you are a cheapskate like me, grocery bags work great too!
As for all of you who walk past my yard with your pets, all I have to say is don't be surprised if you wake up one morning and find your lawn covered with the poop your dog leaves behind on my property. Don't worry... I'll be watching!
Anyway, when we moved into our house, our sweet puppy was kind enough to pick out one small corner of the yard to do her business. She did good for the first year. My husband volunteered to be on poop patrol since she was making it fairly easy for us. However, due to allergies (aka. laziness) I hadn't spent any time in the backyard other than to look out the door and make sure my puppy was still in the backyard. Needless to say, I was very surprised when I actually entered into the weed jungle that we call our backyard. I soon discovered that not only was it a weed jungle, but it was a poop minefield. When I talked to my poor husband later that evening, he admitted that he stopped poop patrol when he noticed that she was strategically pooping all over the yard. Now, there isn't a trashcan or landfill large enough so we have now scheduled a visit to the local dog store for this coming weekend to buy one of these handy dandy puppy septic tanks! All you have to do is dig a hole, and install your tank. Then when cleaning up the mess, you just have to lift the lid and deposit the poo in the tank and let nature work its magic.
Saturday, June 2, 2012
Unicorn Poop Cookie Recipe
Good morning! Since I absolutely have no life, when I woke up this morning, I was super hungry! Instead of eating like normal person would do... I'm embarrassed to say I went on the internet and typed in the word poop to see if the blog would show up. Instead this awesome website for Unicorn Poop Cookies with the recipe popped up! I just have to say that the woman who made these is SUPER CREATIVE and deserves the awards she received for this recipe! I just hope she doesn't get mad that I have posted this in honor of her awesome recipe. Check our her page!
Unicorn-Poop.jpghttp://www.instructables.com/id/Unicorn-Poop/
Friday, June 1, 2012
Introduction
Hello, fellow poopers!
Howdy! My sister started a new blog recently and has been encouraging me to make one as well. Unfortunately, my life is not nearly as exciting as hers. My house consists of myself, my husband, and my dog. Anyway, after texting my sister at ten o'clock and teasing her that I was going to start a blog about poop, I decided...why not? Everyone does it. It's interesting and actually tells you a lot about yourself and your health. Now, don't get me wrong. I don't go around checking out my poop or other peoples to see if they are healthy. Although, I do enjoy talking about it especially if it will gross someone out!
If you have read up to this point...you are one brave cookie! Don't worry and flee the blog out of terror that you will be subjected to all things poop. I do have other interests and will post about them as well. So, seeing as its way past my bedtime... I will bid you adieu and say, "happy pooping and good night!"
Howdy! My sister started a new blog recently and has been encouraging me to make one as well. Unfortunately, my life is not nearly as exciting as hers. My house consists of myself, my husband, and my dog. Anyway, after texting my sister at ten o'clock and teasing her that I was going to start a blog about poop, I decided...why not? Everyone does it. It's interesting and actually tells you a lot about yourself and your health. Now, don't get me wrong. I don't go around checking out my poop or other peoples to see if they are healthy. Although, I do enjoy talking about it especially if it will gross someone out!
If you have read up to this point...you are one brave cookie! Don't worry and flee the blog out of terror that you will be subjected to all things poop. I do have other interests and will post about them as well. So, seeing as its way past my bedtime... I will bid you adieu and say, "happy pooping and good night!"
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